Who's Got The Time?

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Published on Thursday, 01 December 2011 15:41

 Who’s Got The Time?

 by Gregg and Treena Thompson

Hello, saints. I want to take a few moments of your “time” to share some thoughts. Have you ever found yourself saying, “Look at the time?” “Where does the time go?” “There is not enough time in a day.” “I can’t believe it is (this or that) time of year again!” Join the club. Time seems to be one of those precious commodities that there never seems to be enough of. Recently I have had a Scripture on my heart, 1 Peter 4:8:“And above all things have fervent love for one another, for love will cover a multitude of sins.” I found myself asking the Lord, “How do I have fervent love for my wife, my children, and for those we serve at church?” The word fervent means without ceasing, and has the idea of a boiling pot of water. I should love without ceasing and as vigorously as possible. Lord, what about my job, my ministry, running the kids everywhere - where is the time to love the way you want me to love? There is a most difficult and simple answer, MAKE THE TIME! Any relationship worth having takes time to cultivate. Treena and I are currently attending the financial class at church, and one of the underlying themes is to learn to control your money so it does not control you. The Lord has been impressing on my heart that this same principle must apply to my time. This article is not due to any great success made in this area, but rather being tired of using circumstances as an excuse for disobedience.  Marriages and all relationships are under extreme attack, and if we don’t encourage each other in this battle, time will truly slip away and we will become more statistics for the sad issues of failing marriages in the Church. Here are a few ways to utilize T.I.M.E.

 “T” is for Truth: John 8:32 says, “And you shall know the truth and the truth shall set you free.”  Although we know that God’s Truth is what we need in our lives, when we hear it from our spouses it is difficult to face. We get defeated. We feel like we can never do enough; in our minds we think we are doing all the right things. If your spouse tells you that there are problems or certain issues that need to be addressed, then regardless of your feelings or perceptions they need to be dealt with. Treena and I have been trying to find ways to communicate so that we don’t fall into some old patterns we have allowed in our marriage. I am guilty of not addressing issues fervently. I tend to shut down rather than face the problem. It is a work in progress, but it is time we all take a true look at our relationships and realize that God wants to work in our marriages. It starts with asking the Lord to give us willing hearts to receive the truth and the strength to act upon it.

 “I” is for Intimacy: All my dear brothers are saying, “Now you’re talking!” But stay with me for a moment before your minds wander. Intimacy starts with our relationship with Jesus! All Christian couples know that they should be reading and praying together, but many conversations we have with our friends stem from how difficult it is to maintain a consistent devotional life with one another. Life happens whether we are saved or unsaved, but again this cannot be an excuse. We must fervently pursue this part of our relationship with each other, and guys, I must admit that this is an area where I fall short. We must take the lead in this area, and there are no simple answers. We will not be any closer to our wives than we are to the Lord, and we can’t expect things to be any different if we are not willing to make the effort. I am realizing more and more that my wife desires this more than anything else I could do for her. Intimacy with Jesus is directly correlated to how intimate we are with our spouse.

 “M” is for Marriage Moments: At this point I want to encourage all of you to start small. Can you find 5, 10, or 15 minutes each day to pray together and read a scripture or two together? Can you find one day a week to take a walk, grab a cup of coffee, or just turn everything off for an hour? Jesus said, “What, could you not watch with Me one hour?” (Mathew 26:40) If we all take a good look at how we spend our time, I think we would all be surprised at how much time we could free up. How important are your relationships with the Lord and with your spouse to you? Our efforts should reflect that. Recently Treena surprised me by planning an overnight. We were given a free hotel stay and had coupons for dinner at one restaurant and dessert at another. We had dinner, dessert, went to see the movie “Courageous”, an overnight that included breakfast, all for under $30. It was totally the Lord, and it was what we needed to get refocused on each other, but more importantly, on Christ. The point is, seek the Lord on how to bless your spouse and He will start to lead you in creating “marriage moments” that eventually, I believe, will turn into marriage marathons.

“E” is for Edify: Although we spoke earlier about facing the truth, please don’t use it as a tool to tear down each other. Sometimes when we start discussing the problems and issues that need to be dealt with, we may start to wonder if there is anything right with our marriages. Take the time to compliment your spouse, or point out how something blessed you, or even point out something that he or she did in the past that you really enjoyed. Maybe this will encourage them to create new marriage moments. In Ephesians 4:29 we read, “Let no corrupt communication proceed out of your mouth, but that which is good to the use of edifying, that it may minister grace to the hearer.” (Emphasis added.) It should be as easy (preferably easier) to shower your spouse with encouragement as it is to find fault. Ask the Lord to give you a heart of thankfulness for your spouse and a desire to help one another grow in the grace of God.

Treena and I are fast approaching our 20th wedding anniversary, and I am overwhelmed at what the Lord has done in our lives and in the lives of our girls. At the same time I humbly come with a heavy heart, knowing that in many areas I could have been more committed and not have to have experienced some of the trials in our marriage. Please don’t take that the wrong way. God allows certain trials to strengthen our relationships, but I believe that over the years I have brought some of them on myself. Are you doing likewise?

Be encouraged, saints, that with the Lord it is never too late to change! God is not bound by time, and every moment we commit to Him here and now impacts the  Eternity we get to spend with Him in the future. PRAISE THE LORD!!!